From Staff Reports Gwinnett Daily Post
Local/State Tuesday, February 29, 2006
Reproduced by permission
Local/State Tuesday, February 29, 2006
Reproduced by permission
SNELLVILLE (Georgia)
In an unfortunate case of mistaken identity, a Snellville man was arrested Saturday for mooning a police
officer on Scenic Highway at Stratford Drive.
An officer was driving to an unrelated call at 2:34 p.m. when he noticed Jerry Krown* standing in the right-turn-
only lane on Scenic Highway. Krown allegedly had his pants down around his ankles and was “shaking his
buttocks from side to side,” according to a police report.
Asked what he was doing with his pants down, Krown replied “I thought you was my buddy.”
Krown smelled strongly of alcohol and he admitted having consumed a few beers earlier in the evening with some
friends, the report said. He was charged with disorderly conduct.
*Not his real name
In an unfortunate case of mistaken identity, a Snellville man was arrested Saturday for mooning a police
officer on Scenic Highway at Stratford Drive.
An officer was driving to an unrelated call at 2:34 p.m. when he noticed Jerry Krown* standing in the right-turn-
only lane on Scenic Highway. Krown allegedly had his pants down around his ankles and was “shaking his
buttocks from side to side,” according to a police report.
Asked what he was doing with his pants down, Krown replied “I thought you was my buddy.”
Krown smelled strongly of alcohol and he admitted having consumed a few beers earlier in the evening with some
friends, the report said. He was charged with disorderly conduct.
*Not his real name
Did you hear about the brown pelican who was flying under the influence?
That's right, it was intoxicated.
It had been snacking on domoic acid-laced algae, which has been found in the ocean off Laguna Beach, in
Orange County, California. Back in 1961, a whole flock of pelicans ate some of it and went nuts, smashing
into buildings and pecking people--can you imagine being pecked by a pelican? Ouch! That flock of drunk
birds inspired Alfred Hitchcock's movie The Birds.
Anyway, this particular brown pelican hit a car on the Pacific Coast Highway, The driver was as sober as a
Baptist preacher on Sunday morning. And, although it did scare the hellfire out of him, he was not injured,
but his windshield was cracked a good one.
That's right, it was intoxicated.
It had been snacking on domoic acid-laced algae, which has been found in the ocean off Laguna Beach, in
Orange County, California. Back in 1961, a whole flock of pelicans ate some of it and went nuts, smashing
into buildings and pecking people--can you imagine being pecked by a pelican? Ouch! That flock of drunk
birds inspired Alfred Hitchcock's movie The Birds.
Anyway, this particular brown pelican hit a car on the Pacific Coast Highway, The driver was as sober as a
Baptist preacher on Sunday morning. And, although it did scare the hellfire out of him, he was not injured,
but his windshield was cracked a good one.
The drunken bird wasn't so lucky. It suffered a broken leg and a gashed mouth. It refused a breatherizer,
but was taken to a local animal hospital, where doctors restrained it so they could take a blood test.
No charges were filed.
but was taken to a local animal hospital, where doctors restrained it so they could take a blood test.
No charges were filed.
From Staff Reports Gwinnett Daily Post
Local/State September 2, 2006
Reproduced by permission
Local/State September 2, 2006
Reproduced by permission
NORCROSS (Georgia)
Police on Tuesday arrested a man who allegedly ran naked through Chelsea Park apartments and
then jumped into the trash compactor.
Police went to the complex at 7:10 p.m. after a resident reported seeing a nude man near her building.
Oui-Oui Fred Zaiwa,* 21, was found lying in the Dumpster with a plastic 5-gallon bucket over his head and
a knife in his hand, according to a police report. He refused to come out, instead attempting to cover
himself further with trash bags.
Police made several attempts to get him to drop the knife, including spraying him with a water hose,
Tasering him and shooting at his hand with a nonlethal shotgun round. Finally they used Animal Control
dog poles to lasso his wrists and pull him out, the police report stated.
Police on Tuesday arrested a man who allegedly ran naked through Chelsea Park apartments and
then jumped into the trash compactor.
Police went to the complex at 7:10 p.m. after a resident reported seeing a nude man near her building.
Oui-Oui Fred Zaiwa,* 21, was found lying in the Dumpster with a plastic 5-gallon bucket over his head and
a knife in his hand, according to a police report. He refused to come out, instead attempting to cover
himself further with trash bags.
Police made several attempts to get him to drop the knife, including spraying him with a water hose,
Tasering him and shooting at his hand with a nonlethal shotgun round. Finally they used Animal Control
dog poles to lasso his wrists and pull him out, the police report stated.
Zaiwa was charged with public indecency and misdemeanor obstruction of law enforcement.
*Not his real name
*Not his real name
DULUTH (Georgia)
A 44-year-old Duluth woman was hospitalized Wednesday after she apparently suffered paranoid
delusions at Bradford Gwinnett at 100 Castor Drive.
When police arrived, the victim was throwing all her belongings from her patio into the street. She told an
officer she believed moths were trying to get into her home, so was trying to lure the moths back outside
with her belongings.
The woman wouldn't’t allow the officer inside to speak with her because she was afraid poisonous air may
get in. She also wore diapers on her feet, supposedly to protect her from the poison.
A 44-year-old Duluth woman was hospitalized Wednesday after she apparently suffered paranoid
delusions at Bradford Gwinnett at 100 Castor Drive.
When police arrived, the victim was throwing all her belongings from her patio into the street. She told an
officer she believed moths were trying to get into her home, so was trying to lure the moths back outside
with her belongings.
The woman wouldn't’t allow the officer inside to speak with her because she was afraid poisonous air may
get in. She also wore diapers on her feet, supposedly to protect her from the poison.
The woman was transported to Gwinnett Medical Center for evaluation, where a doctor determined she
should have been on several medications for schizophrenia.
should have been on several medications for schizophrenia.
Submitted by Missy Martin
This is a true account as recorded in the Police Log of Sarasota, Florida...
An elderly Florida lady did her shopping and, upon returning to her car, found four males in the act of
leaving with her vehicle. She dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding to scream at
the top of her voice:
"I have a gun, and I know how to use it! Get out of the car!"
The four men didn't wait for a second invitation. They got out and ran like mad. The lady, somewhat
shaken, then proceeded to load her shopping bags into the back of the car and got into the driver's seat.
She was so shaken that she could not get her key into the ignition. She tried and tried, and then it dawned
on her why... For the same reason she did not understand why there was a football, a Frisbee and two 12
packs of beer in the front seat!
A few minutes later, she found her own car parked four or five spaces farther down. She loaded her bags
into the car and drove to the police station to report her mistake.
This is a true account as recorded in the Police Log of Sarasota, Florida...
An elderly Florida lady did her shopping and, upon returning to her car, found four males in the act of
leaving with her vehicle. She dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding to scream at
the top of her voice:
"I have a gun, and I know how to use it! Get out of the car!"
The four men didn't wait for a second invitation. They got out and ran like mad. The lady, somewhat
shaken, then proceeded to load her shopping bags into the back of the car and got into the driver's seat.
She was so shaken that she could not get her key into the ignition. She tried and tried, and then it dawned
on her why... For the same reason she did not understand why there was a football, a Frisbee and two 12
packs of beer in the front seat!
A few minutes later, she found her own car parked four or five spaces farther down. She loaded her bags
into the car and drove to the police station to report her mistake.
The sergeant to whom she told the story couldn't stop laughing. He pointed to the other end of the counter,
where four pale men were reporting a car jacking by a mad, elderly woman described as white, less than
five feet tall, glasses, curly white hair, and carrying a large handgun.
No charges were filed.
If you're going to have a Senior Moment, make it a memorable one!
From Staff Reports Gwinnett Daily Post
Local/State September 2, 2006
Reproduced by permission
Local/State September 2, 2006
Reproduced by permission
Wrong Time for a Full Moon
Flying Under the Influence
Poison Air
The Streaker
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